Hopefully this stuff is ultra-pasteurized.

I...I...want to throw up.

Who wants to eat ice cream made from another person's bodily fluids? Not I.

shop around

I would squeal with delight if somebody presented me with these nebulae-enhanced notebooks.

Photo courtesy of freshphotons

Or this microscope necklace ($12) found on shanalogic.com.

the clever dinopsis

While I'm perusing the frozen food section of Meijer, gladiator spiders rigging booby traps to catch prey, mate!

I will be totally groove sharkin' like this guy if tomorrow's exam goes well

That's all :)

assignment: a response to Julie/Julia (for school)

bonjour bitches! I'm Julia Child!

I'm enjoying a French glass of wine while I work on these questions for school, pardon my slur (or rant).

To begin (not that anyone really cares) I didn't like the film Julie & Julia -- not the first time I saw it, nor the most recent.  I was dragged to an MJR Cineplex by my mom and accompanying neighbors on a steamy mid-August day in 2009. The mission: girls day. Why is it a requirement that on every stinking girls day I must endure at least one chick flick? Nothing against the genre (I have mad love for Meg Ryan and her kinfolk) but come on!! I oftentimes deem ear-friendly music adored by women in their early forties "mom jams" -- EVERYONE, the movie Julie & Julia is a total visual mom jam. The whole time Amy Adams whines while Meryl Streep burbles with Julia Child likeness. I don't get it. The movie's only saving grace: Stanley Tucci. Who am I kidding, I'm a Stanley Tucci fan girl. Ever since he chased down Beethoven in his cow skin boots my heart's been a flutter. Now, for the stuff you actually care about.

1. Julie Powell used her blog to relay bits and pieces of her life, specifically the Julie/Julia project. The writing is good. I'm finding words I wish I knew how to use. There is an ever present effort to give recognition to her readers. This line specifically (from October 27, 2003) made me laugh,

"God, it’s like how Hemingway would feel if he suddenly, against all his instincts and will, took a job writing Hallmark cards."

2. I think there is a definite blending of journaling and memoir. Sometimes she relays a day's events and in her most recent post (detailing Julia Child's death) she writes from the heart. A storytelling quality also exists in her posts.

3. Um, did Amy Adams utter the F word once in the movie? The real Julie seems a bit ballsier than Amy Adams piss-poor portrayal of her. I wish the real Julie played Julie in the movie -- that would have been a better spent $7 indeed. Ticket sales probably would have plummeted per my requests (damn!). AA's Julie went from super whiny to less whiny when she finally gets her end-all-be-all book deal at the film's finish. As far as authenticity goes clearly I like the real blog more. I don't think the movie makers integrated enough of it. Who would pay to see some thirty-something spat about her poorly laundered wool coat, no one cares. The screen play dabbled in enough of the blog to let the plot flow smoothly on screen.

4. The film was partially about blogging but I found part of it focused on Julie getting over whatever insecurities she harbored about her own failures and successes. The other half was Meryl Streep donning skirts aching over her bellybutton as she attempted to flambe her way through culinary adversity. The whole point was well meshed for the move because Julie looked up to Julia for strength and encouragement. Like an Aesop fable a lesson was presented, don't give up on life just because your job sucks and your friends are more successful -- good things will happen to you too!

Can you really blame Mrs. Child for not giving a turkey's tail feather about some blog in her late years? She was probably like what the hell is the Internet? All that was on her mind in '04 was getting drunk on wine that had notes of dunkaroos in its bouquet (just like me).

To conclude, I hope this makes sense.

apollonian gasket, explained

If you've eve been like "wudduhfuh is an apollonian gasket??" let this little spark plug explain it to you: 

Rightly so, my job was just made a LOT easier. 

name change

Eminem? Circa your cinematic debut? Is that you?

There??? Did this lovely dissection graphic get your attention? I decided to change my url from littleowlsong (because the name does not reflect the content of my posts) to fromthelabbench.blogspot.com. Capice?

Photo courtesy of freshphotons

from the lab bench - Tyler Durden edition

Ya know that scene in Fight Club where Brad Pitt licks his lips, smacks them together and plants a nice one upon Edward Norton's hand?  Afterward Mr. Pitt liberally dusts a fine white powder atop the new kiss which sends Mr. Norton into a writhing pain? If you don't, care if I remind you?

Lye! Fantastic lye, also known as sodium hydroxide or NaOH mixed with a little saliva are the agents of this excruciating chemical burn. If you've seen Fight Club you're aware lye is often an ingredient used in soap making and in the manufacturing of paper products and whatnot. Yesterday I had the pleasure of mixing up a solution of sodium hydroxide to act as a buffer and decrease the pH of another solution. I accurately measured out solid chips of NaOH with still hands comparable to a surgeons. I then added the chips to a beaker containing the corresponding amount of water to make a 4 normal sodium hydroxide solution. This beaker, with stirring rod in tow, was carefully placed on a hot plate to ensure proper mixing. As the NaOH pellets interact with the water, heat can be seen dissipating from the beaker (the same kind of heat plundering Ed's hand). No wonder another name for sodium hydroxide is "caustic soda".

consider the following?

Long time no post, eh? Sorry for the blog neglect, and erm...a little homework neglect as well. Let's see, if you didn't know, I spent the last week in California which is why my head has been up my arse in regards to "real work". Spring break is almost over and I have quite a bit to accomplish in the coming days. Biochemistry test on Monday and I'm ill prepared at the moment. Luckily I am equipped with a semester's worth of cell biology crammed into my tiny noggin and the coming test covers the amazing biomolecule protein. Many hours will be spent in the lab between Monday and Thursday learning tissue culture and what not. The cherry on top of my sundae has to be the organic chemistry test falling on Thursday, March 3rd. I think I'll write about some other stuff because my life, is boring.

Photo courtesy of blueginjava.tumblr.com

Why my memory is my memoir

I wrote my memoir about running when it hits forty because I miss warm weather. I like warm weather and feel isolated in my home once winter creeps up and taps me on the shoulder like a big fat jerk. I didn't really extrapolate on my cabin fever in the memoir because I didn't have time to. Sorry about the giant space after the title I'm not sure why formatting was acting stupid on me -- perhaps it has something to do with copy and pasting my work from Word.

In the meantime, Happy Valentine's Day all! 

You might as well thank your biochemistry for all those lovey-dovey happy feelings being in love makes you feel. Sorry oxytocin, you need a shout out too!

Oh, what? Too cynical? Fine. It's the human condition to fall in love. Now leave me to my box of chocolates, har-har.

Thank you tumblr for pretty pictures.

writing On Writing...

I own two Stephen King books -- The Shining and The Cell. I have yet to read either, but I just might after reading exactly 35% (100 pages, hah) of his book On Writing. I'm tossing around reading the remaining 65% of On Writing because, shockingly enough, it's a good book and might just end my inability-to-finish-a-book slump. His writing isn't bogged down with fluff. Pretty language isn't a bad thing but when you're used to reading Tolstoy-thick research papers, being concise is much appreciated.  

Stephen King doesn't suck. He's a gazillionaire penning a bunch of bestselling genre-spanning novels. I'm surely interested in what kind of creep weirdo wrote the book It, aren't you? Perhaps this is more attributed to Stanley Kubrick's evil genius film making but I recall a spine-tingly sensation across my back as the hallucinatory hotel blood river scene surged across my Zenith's screen. 

King constructs his memories in On Writing with a fluidity that allows for a proper melding of space and time. It's really cool. He admits he can't recall a great deal from his early childhood but he manages to touch on it with funny (and some grossly sad) anecdotes. I think these are needed to get the full picture of King's semi-permanent roots and how he came to write. 

The book reads like a good story but generally I think there are elements of storytelling in memoirs. King doesn't get all gooey and melt to pieces but he's speaks of being rejected and his struggles young writer. I'm worried I will have an early 1970s Stephen King moment after graduation. No one will want me to pipette in their test tubes...wait, that doesn't sound quite right, sigh... It's possible he wasn't supposed to publish Carrie until 1974 and the universe wouldn't make sense if he wrote it a moment sooner or later. It took his wife's reassurance to let him know he had something. 

I'd like to finish the book before I speculate as to what King's big take home is with On Writing. When King talks of his childhood, was anyone else unable to shake the image of Gordie/young Wil Wheaton from Stand By Me from their brain? 

A great to-do list

I'm not looking forward to scheduling classes for the summer and fall. I have no plan and I suck at going to see advisors. I also need to take a math placement exam at Macomb because surprise! I have yet to take any math classes for some odd reason. I like math too, it's something structured when my life is chaotic. I figured I would delay an algebra class because I need to take my GRE come August and a refresher in math is much needed.

I'm also starting to look at graduate programs and applying this fall is a daunting task. Along with the cost of the GRE, application fees go hand in hand with applying. Do not get me started on how much it costs to actually attend graduate school. Is succumbing to the man and getting a job a better option? I don't think so, I don't want to cut my educational adventures short. Before I know it I'll be three kids deep and the whole thing'll be a bust.

For the time being, I'm more interested in investing in my ever-increasing book collection. My latest purchase: Final Exits by Michael Largo is an illustrated encyclopedia of how we die. While at the Borders counter I also picked up a copy of Szunyoghy and Feher's Human Anatomy for Artists for ten bucks, hell yeah! I sincerely believe the cashier was questioning my motives, but trust I have none. I just love books, especially ones on anatomy. It's like a weakness. This past Christmas I received a copy of the Barnes and Noble G'd out special edition of Grey's Anatomy with all the bells and whistles. It's gorgeous. 

It's time to get serious though. I must allocate my funds to impending doom and rejection. Hey adulthood, when did you spring up and start feeling real??